I went in the woods and out again and nothing was the same.

Theres nothing more annoying then a set of keys dangling on your knee while youre trying to drive.
I shit you not.

As dangerous as that might sound, theres no need to worry. I dare not waste my thought on subjects of actual merit. More so, ive been thinking about the current state of Monster Energy.

Now I first discovered this batch of tainted brew somewhere during the summer of my 12'th year, which would christen this summer as the 6'th year of its consumption. No need for a pat on the back, ill do it myself when I stop typing.

So heres the deal, when I first was introduced to this green laced black can, I was in the midst of a lightless, humid, cyber cafe. Of course this was a but a short stage in my life but stood as the main foundation of net curiousity and of course, this passion for a beverage I still find to be like no other.

Down I would guzzle these ounces of caffiene chocked canisters of sweet bitter nectar. And occasionally down the cafe's infamous flashbang. (Basically 3 energy drinks of your choice poured into a large cup that you were supposed to chug) And for a while, things were good, until of course the cafe was shut down during the towns fight against the drug dealing found in many cyber cafes throughout the area. (This one had no drug use going on but had to comply with the towns aorders and close, shitsuxwhtugonnado)

So here I was, an addict without a source. And at this perticular time, Monster was no common item found at the local 7/11 or grocery store. I had to run around from shit gas station to shit gas station in hopes they might have a few in stock. But I didnt mind, in a way, this drink was my very own, no one else knew about it, nor did anyone make an attempt to.
So here I was, an addict with his quaint little can in hand, strolling about on his golden Dino, like some pimped out little bitch from Glenwood. And it soon became a staple of ine, that little can, something I had that no one else did.

No, no I did not simply lust for this liquid because it was something no one else had, because it was different and I too wished to be different, no, I wanted it because it was there for me, it was mine and no one could take that away.

Well its been six years and 1400+ cans since then and in the past 6 months I have gradually started to notice something quite unsettling.
Monster is everywhere. I mean everywhere. There used to be a time when id be lucky if I found it in the back of a White Hen, graciously praising the establishment for its ability to even be there, hidden in the back of a fridge, shrouded by a wall of RedBull. But this is no longer the case. Now I can easily find an entire fridge dedicated to the substance, abound with every flavor under the sun. And because of this, every half assed shitless nobody can grab a can so that they can be a faggot skater fuck or be XTREME with CAFFEINE.

Whats this all mean, really? Nothing I can quite put my finger on, all i know is that I dont quite like it, and that all I care about at the moment.

alsoheresatower

sup

You see Blind through Seventeen Eyes.
Code written and etched into your skin.

Fumble your Fingers and contort their stance.
Play God in this Cyber Playground.
Im No Nebula, but Kevin Trudeau plays Pocket Pool.

Tear the Mouse open and out spews tar.

I had my question and I found my answer and I didnt like it so I didnt share it.

I think I finally figured it out.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with computer animated raptors pleasuring each other.

When will you cunts come to terms with this?
I mean, its not that hard to realize, all you have to do is Open the door.
Get on the floor.
Everybody walk the Dinosaur.

Boom boom acka-lacka lacka boom
Boom boom acka-lacka boom boom

The last one wasn't as truthful as it was during the days of its youth.

Im in Missouri.
Home of the Amish, semis (amish people and semis dont mix well fyi), Silverdollar city and enough fireworks and knives to wash you and your whole pathetic life out of existance.

Also they dont have computers.
shitsux

BE BACK IN WEEK K, K

Thats a god damned lie and tell me you believed it for more then a second.
A folder of avatars and sigs have been rendered useless, I dont know who anyone is anymore, hell, I have problems finding myself. The old system of voting has been thrown out the window. I have no fucking idea what im doing.

But I have pictures.
Lots of pictures.
Ill always feel safe.
Because I have pictures.